Resolved

Today I figured I had to go mainstream and write something about it being the new year. Maybe something along the lines of a “clean slate”. Or new beginnings. Or how this year promises to be a good one. But the truth is, I can’t promise that. So what do I do instead? What any other hipster blogger/journalist wannabe would do. Check Facebook for inspiration.

As I ventured through the never ending stream of newsfeed, I start to notice a trend. No not like a hat that refuses to stay on your head or cover your ears kind of trend. More like a similar train of thought kind of trend. Statuses ranging from hope for the new year to be better than the last, to complaints about those people who complain about what they can’t or haven’t changed. And then I couldn’t help but think about what Steve talked about in church at Emergence on Sunday. Everyone is reminiscing on their trail of regrets.

Isn’t that what we do every year though? It’ s just around this time where we feel like we deserve a new beginning. Or this day where trillions of “resolutions” because of this year’s promise for a new beginning. But to make a resolution there had to be a failure in the past. If we were honest, resolutions would be called past- year’s failings. Those who resolve to stop smoking had to have started. Those who resolve to look for a new job obviously felt like they failed finding their old one. Those who resolve to loose some weight haven’t done the best job of seeing their feet in the past. In order to look toward the future with hope, we must look at the past and notice our failures.

But what do we really define as failure? Think about that for a second. Or better yet, what do we define as success? (Happy New Year by the way…its 12 o’clock). Our culture defines our success based upon what we do. If you don’t have a good job, you’ve failed. If you’re family life isn’t the Brady Bunch, you’ve failed. If your life isn’t the hollywood’s version of the typical perfect American, you’ve failed. The problem with that though is the typical American fails. We live in a culture where failure is a weakness and our weaknesses can never be shown. So we cover up our weaknesses with a smile and pretend like everything is alright. We revert to drugs. Run to alcohol. And are diagnosed with depression in the process. If that is you today, that you feel like you’ve missed the mark, that by worldly standards you’ve failed, know you’re in good company.

So I guess this is our fear, the fear of failure. The fear that we won’t meet the standard put in front of us. The fear that our weakness will be exposed to a world full of success. A fear that our smile will fade for just a second and your reputation of emotional strength will be lost. We can’t show our weaknesses because the world will know you have failed, that you’re not the strong person your smile portrays you to be. The real failure though, is failing to realize your failures. Covering up your mistakes and skipping over what you have learned from these failures. Or even failing to realize we come from a long line of failures. People who can’t boast about what they can bring to the table. Even at the beginning of the world, Adam and Eve failed resisting that one tree. The greatest Christian to ever live, first tortured and murdered millions of Christians. Paul, who was this great Christian, did the most to bring the gospel to the ends of the earth. Paul should have the strongest resume, the biggest success but in 2 Corinthians 11: 21-31 he knows he has nothing to offer. By every worldly standard, he’s a failure. We come from a long line of failures.

We try to fix our past with the things we can do in the future but the past cannot be changed. We all have that stained shirt. The one where your kid hugs you with a mouth full of chocolate pudding, where you missed your mouth or someone laughed to hard while drinking cherry Cola. Its that type of stain that even through the magic that comes with Tide, it will never be the same. You try to cover it up with a belt or a jacket but you know its there and its burning in your mind. And you can’t ask your friend for a new shirt because well they’re a slob too. Everyone has they’re stain. But there is good news! There is someone who has a clean a shirt. And he’s already given it to you. Jesus Christ offered his life for us not because we did it right but because we can never get it right. The cross exists because we’ve failed. There is no breath but in God. No strength, but in his power. No hope, but in Christ.

Jesus didn’t come to make us look better. He didn’t come with a promise for a perfect life. But to take our failures and make them something great. “I will boast all the more in my weaknesses. For when I am weak I am made strong (2 Corinthians 2:10).” When we take what he has to offer we are new, but we can’t mix the new with the old. We need to face our weaknesses and be content with our failures. Know that success isn’t defined by how we compare to others but by the one who died to save us, by who we are when no one is looking, boasting in our weaknesses.

Take time to thank God for the times we have failed, for our weaknesses. Show grace to others who have failed; those who have failed us and have hurt us. If you are living with regret, something you’ve covered up with a happy face, let it go. “While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8).” He will take away your failures and give you righteousness in return. We can move on to 2013 once we’ve let go of 2012

Be Still

Sometimes the hardest thing in life, in faith, is to trust and be still. We’re always trying to be our own ruler and control everything, every moment in our lives. Even when we “give” our lives up to God we want him to do it in our own timeframe. And then it hits us in the midst of our chaos, of our depression, our doubt, our questioning, a soft voice whispers, “Be Still” ~Psalm 46:10~

New Year's Resolution

Its talked about all throughout history. It makes decisions for our leaders but yet it is just as common within each of us just as much as it is within the hierarchy. Although it is present in all of us like a virus, it is defined differently by each character. Tis the season for fear. Tis the year, tis the life for fear.

In closing out the new year, many things enter our mind about our past. Do you remember that trip to a Wal-Mart only a few minutes away and making it into an all day trip? Or the time we laughed till we got that deep piercing feeling in our ribs at something we couldn't understand? Oh,or what about that time we took a detour because come on, no one likes to study on Sunday night? Come on, admit it, 2012 has been a pretty epic year full of love, laughter and change none of us expected.

As we reminisce on this year's past, we cant help but think of those things that have made an impact on our character for the rest of our lives. That friend that has been lost because of a stupid argument but you dare not say sorry? Or that time you slammed the door in the face of your best friend because you couldn't figure out why you were angry? Oh or what about that time you fell too hard for someone who broke your heart at the opportune moment when you felt all alone? Thats it, thats the look, your face goes from a laughing smile to the confused look of a cringing heart. As this year comes to its end and never again will we be able to see a pattern like 12/12/12 until 2/22/22, I can't help but think about the mistakes I will make within the next year.

Fear only comes from things we've heard or have done. From the past, now looking toward the future that those thing may happen again. Or that vague fear that something will happen to you as it happened to those who came to you for advice. Could you take your own advice in this situation? Or do you become the hypocrite you have always seen in yourself?

Happiness only comes through “family and friends”. Happiness only comes through “possessions”. Happiness simply “grows on trees” as the splendor of the outdoors. Authors worldwide write books about happiness, how to obtain it and how to keep it coming through rainbows and hopes of unicorns. But not many explain the fear that comes when happiness is present. Or the only way to even truly begin thinking about happiness is to first conquer the thing that has instilled fear as first priority in your life. Maybe its fear of abandonment? Or fear of disappointment? Or a delicate fear of trust? Sounds pretty simple, right? But this is step two, these are mere definitions of the things we fear in our life.

“To define is to limit”. Maybe Oscar Wilde has it right. What if we were to take a step back and define where we went wrong? To notice the fear of loss. The desire to feel desired. Or the fear of losing control. If we can define what we fear, thats how we can limit it, how we can catch it. First gather the evidence, gather the things that have created this fear, sit down and listen to your favorite song by Jack Johnson, grab some hot chocolate with a shot of espresso and notice the little things. You'd be surprised what you come up with. You'd be surprised what you've been fearing this whole time. How simple these fears are. How we've simply been looking at the shadow of something so small.

We all fail for a reason. Its okay, admit it, you've failed plenty of times in your life. If you can't say that, frankly, you've made mistakes, you have failed; well then thats the true failure isn't it? Where is your character then? How can you talk to someone and say that you understand? We all go through our trials, the tests of life, many of us fail the first time; but it is then that you realize whats missing. You realize the things you've forgotten. There is a reason for our past, so we can look back at it and see how it has defined our lives now. You realize that if you didn't lose a friend through something they failed to notice, you would never appreciate the ones you have now. Or that if you didn't get into a fight with your best friend, you would have never realized those bottled up emotions or never found yourself both pouring out those bottles, or that that best friend will always be there regardless of your stupidity. Oh, or if that person never broke your heart, you would never realize those hidden people in your life, or how much you truly loved them, or that that person would grow up being the best friend you've ever had; or maybe you would have never realized that they tore up your life only so someone can come in and pick it all up. You would have never realized what is worthwhile if you never took in the good with the bad. Never defined.

So maybe that's your new year's resolution. To define the trials in your life to learn as much as you can from them. To file through your life and find the happiness that comes with the simple things. To define and ultimately limit your fears. That sure is mine. Now what's your fear?